


Lockdown

by katyastevens



Series: Lockdown (Open Heart) [1]
Category: Open Heart (Visual Novels)
Genre: Active shooter scenario, F/M, Hospital lockdown, Hurt/Comfort, Separation Anxiety, Worry, of a sort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-31
Updated: 2020-03-31
Packaged: 2021-03-01 00:30:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,558
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23415970
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/katyastevens/pseuds/katyastevens
Summary: Ethan's outside the hospital. Kerry is inside. And the hospital is on lockdown.Ever since Kerry has started with the diagnostics team, she's been spending all her free time researching. One morning she decides to head into the hospital early to prep, and get locked in when an active shooter report is made
Relationships: Ethan Ramsey/Main Character (Open Heart)
Series: Lockdown (Open Heart) [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1684357
Comments: 4
Kudos: 49





	1. Part One

<\- A quick reference image of Kerry Hawethorne, my main character for Open Heart

* * *

_We’ll make this work._

_Damn it, Rookie. We can’t go around doing this._

_I’m not your boss anymore, and that means..._

_Amazing. You almost_ didn’t _kill that patient._

_There are some things that are worth any risk._

_Kerry? Kerry, you fell asleep again._

Kerry stifled a yawn as she sat on the train, yet another thick medical book open on her lap. It was more highlighter ink than printed words, almost dripping with vivid hues of pink, yellow, and green. She had thought that maybe her days of furious cramming were behind her, consigned to lonely nights in her dorm or late night study sessions with other aspiring doctors.

Instead, almost all waking hours were consumed by research and medical studies. Heavy books taken from the hospital, medical journals read on her phone, or podcasts streamed endlessly from the moment she woke up to when she went to bed (if she remembered to turn them off).

She was the best intern of her year, the youngest to join the diagnostics team, and she was going to fight to stay there. Unfortunate whispers and rumours had abounded since almost day one that if she slipped, or someone else excelled, she could be transferred off the team.

Kerry bit her lip. Not a chance that would happen, she had rightfully earned her place and no one would take it from her. Still, a few good diagnoses and some chance encounters weren't enough to stay her position, and so she researched.

Naively, Kerry had thought that being on the diagnostics team would mean more time learning under Ethan, but it had been the opposite. Between clinics, Esme, and her own patients outside of diagnostics, it felt like she spent a scant five minutes with the team before running tasks all over the hospital.

As the announcer stated the next stop, Kerry shut her book and let out a long sigh. She had almost two hours before rounds, most of a book to get through, and an empty diagnostics office waiting for her. And, if she was lucky, a chance to talk to Ethan before work.

\---

Two cups of coffee, a hurriedly eaten pastry, and one hour later Kerry had holed herself up in the diagnostics office with books scattered around and a notebook with hasty, messy writing. She had gone through the last few cases, emptying her mind of all that she could and tried to re-diagnose, or at least find suitable leads to follow up on.

With a sigh, she scribbled out her notes, tore off the paper, and added it to the growing pile. She was bouncing ideas into an ocean, no responses received, and she was beginning to get a headache.

Kerry closed her eyes for two seconds, pushed her chair back, and began tidying up the office. Books flipped closed and returned to the shelves, computer hibernated, trash in the bin, and she left the room as clean as when she arrived.

The night shift had ended and people were slowly switching over. She gave Danny at the nurse's station a nod hello on the way to the cafeteria; a moment later footsteps echoed behind her.

"Morning, Doctor Hawethorne. I didn't see you arrive today."

Kerry turned to Danny, trying not to show too much relief. Talking to someone about something _other_ than diagnostics would be a change. "Got here early today. Needed to do some studying."

Danny raised his eyebrows. "Today? Sienna says you've been studying non-stop for weeks."

Kerry pursed her lips. It hadn't been that bad, had it?

As they entered the cafeteria a few people beckoned Danny over; with an apologetic smile he left Kerry, and she instead grabbed a bottle of cold water and some painkillers. She took two, popped the cap off the water, and easily drank a third in a few deep gulps.

She shoved out her chair, arranging it at an angle to the table and slumped down. The television was on a continuous news channel, subtitles active, and Kerry let herself zone out.

\---

Danny caught back up to Kerry on the way out, and the two of them swapped idle chatter - hospital gossip, bad patients, family news, and general life events. They were almost at the reception desk when an alarm started to sound and all the doors began to lock.

"Someone got too close to the maternity ward perimeter again," one of the nurses mused, partially suppressing an annoyed sigh. A moment later it seemed like everyone’s pager went off, as people reached into their pockets.

_Active shooter. ER._

\--

Ethan was one to always make sure he got to work ahead of schedule. Fifteen minutes wasn't that much time all things considered, but it was enough time to get coffee, answer any immediate emails, and prepare himself for the day.

Coffee in hand and mind already running through diagnosis and treatment plans for their latest patient, he didn't notice the small but growing number of people outside the hospital, nor did he pay much attention to the first responders that were studded all over the place.

"Excuse me, sir, but you can't go any further."

Ethan frowned, belatedly pulled out of his thoughts to witness the scene in front of him. Police cars, people with security vests, guns by their sides and radios in their hands. Vivid 'Do Not Cross' tape strung everywhere like confetti, and more than a couple of people with their phones out, recording the local situation.

"I work here."

"Not today. Someone called in a situation earlier, place is locked down tight. Until we figure out what's happened and how to resolve it, we're not letting anyone in or out."

"Then I'll wait."

"Fine by me," the security officer said, giving a shrug as Ethan turned to sit on one of the benches that lined the grassy front of the hospital. He took another sip of his coffee and glanced at his phone. Ten minutes until start of shift. he would have expected June to be there by now. Baz would turn up precisely one minute early, and Hawethorne...

Ethan tried not to let the grimace show on his face, aware that at least one phone camera was pointing in his direction. He didn't know _what_ Hawethorne would be doing - whether she'd be in her apartment furiously cramming the contents of yet another book into her brain, or if she had decided to pull yet another full day in the hospital.

_A tired doctor is no use to anyone. An exhausted diagnostician is no use to_ me.

_I had a long night. I was looking up studies for our patient._

_Why? We have a diagnosis, and a treatment plan._

_Because…_

_Because_ what _, Rookie? All I see is you running yourself into the ground for no good reason._

_Because I'm not good enough._

_Not good enough?_

_Yes. How can I compete with the rest of your team? They have years of experience on me, and I'm only a second year resident._

A second year resident who had made her place on the diagnostics team, Ethan had reminded her. He had seen her furiously thinking and researching, tossing out ideas into the scrum for the rest of the team to hook on to. The exhilaration he saw on her face upon getting a correct diagnosis was second to her delight at being able to tell the patient they knew what they were suffering from, how to cure it, and that they would soon be leaving the hospital.

Ethan checked the time again. Right on the hour. He could see a few people in labcoats standing around in mild confusion, and others he recognised by face. None of them were Hawethorne, and as he glanced back at his phone he slid his thumb across the screen, unlocking it, then hovered over the contacts button. A second of thought later, his phone was once more resting in his pocket and he turned back to the lockdown.

\---

Running through an active shooter situation in a safe, pre-planned environment was a world apart from being thrown right into the middle of an active shooter situation. Thankfully for Kerry, the difference was similar to that of medical school versus residency, and after a moment of shock she managed to press down the panic and began to think rationally.

The incident had started in the ER, and between the general reception and there was a maze of hallways and stairs, complete with a few staff only areas that needed keycard or pin access. Unfortunately, the area beyond them was an even worse maze, making it a choice of hiding or futilely trying to make their way past the shooter.

Thankfully there were rooms they could lock down as emergency access dotted all around the hospital, pointed out in prior scenario training. A few staff had already started moving, Danny being one of them, opening one the rooms and looking in to check that they were suitable. He waved over a few people, Kerry included, while others moved to find their own secure areas.

Kerry slid in as the last person, the door clicking shut before being followed by silence. Someone in the room let out a breath and the lights clicked off, leaving them in darkness. Kerry shuffled in place, resting her back straight against the wall. They had all squeezed against the same wall the door was on, Danny keeping an eye out the window as best as he could.

“How long do we need to stay here?”

“As long as we need to.”

\---

More police and special forces made their way to the hospital, expanding the clear zone around the building. Accompanying them were more reporters and civilians crowding around the police tape. Ethan moved away from the epicentre towards a slightly less crowded area, and checked his pager once again. As he put it back his fingers slid over his phone once more, and he plucked it out again.

As before, he swiped across the screen and opened the contacts page. It was a good twenty minutes after normal starting time, and he had still yet to see any sign of Kerry. No blonde hair in an intricate hairstyle, no fancy clothing that she had treated herself to in celebration of joining the diagnostics team, no wandering over with a heavy book in her hands and dark bags under her eyes from a too-long study session the night before.

He pressed Kerry’s number and held the phone up to his ear. It rang once, twice…five…eight times and went to answer machine. Ethan frowned and hung up without leaving a message. He scrolled through the rest of his contacts list but found a strong lack of other people he could ask of Kerry’s whereabouts.

Placing his phone back in his pocket, he glanced back up at the scene. A couple more police were waved through the cordon and one headed straight to another and began a heated discussion. After a few minutes one nodded and headed to a separate area just beyond the other.

Finally, Ethan saw a familiar face. No one from the diagnostics team, no one from the new influx of interns. They stopped at the cordon and looked left, looked right, before turning and heading away from Ethan into a group of people.

\---

Only one person had their pager on, silenced and held carefully in their hand to minimise the sound from vibrations. No clock in the room or visible from the window, the only sound people breathing, all sense of time began to slip away.

“Still nothing,” breathed one after glancing through the window before crouching back down. Kerry had seen her on a few occasions around the hospital, mostly brief and across the cafeteria during meal breaks. Kerry didn’t even know what department she was from, how long she’d been working there, or even her name.

And Kerry wasn’t even sure if now was a good time to make small talk. As a result, everyone in the room descended into silence once more, irregular breaths being the only measure of time.

\---

Forty-five minutes.

Forty-five minutes since Ethan had intended to walk up to the diagnostics room, greet Baz, June, roll his eyes as Kerry powered through yet another stack of books and journals.

Forty-five minutes since maybe they had details of their newest patient, unseen diagnostics, questions and queries flying around until they hammered down the details and began to run through a treatment plan.

Perhaps a couple of hours until the patient arrived and they could start the treatment. Baz, June, and Kerry would all do their part – maybe June would pick up on some obscure detail they’d missed; maybe Kerry would get an idea of something different from talking to the patient; maybe Baz would have a spark of inspiration or a sudden epiphany.

They’d get there. They always figured out the problem in the end, and that was all that everything was. A problem. A puzzle. Something that always had a solution. Always. _Always_.

A hospital lockdown was not a problem he could solve. Not even if his entire team was there could they even think of a way to resolve the situation. That was something to be left to the professionals – and he was _not_ one of those professionals.

He stepped by a bench and pulled out his phone. This time, when it went to answer machine he ended the call and re-started it. Maybe Kerry was asleep – maybe she had accidentally slept in after one of her study sessions. Maybe if he called her phone enough it would wake her, she’d pick up, answer in that sleepy voice he had heard so much, that reminded him of those two nights they had stolen together.

Ethan flicked the screen off and shoved his phone away in frustration. He ran a hand through his hair and turned back to look at the hospital. There was a skeleton crew outside; most of the police and emergency services had disappeared inside which he desperately, _desperately_ hoped was a good sign.

They were heading in to clear the hospital, evacuate staff and patients, and resolve whatever situation had caused this mess in the first place. Kerry would turn up at the perimeter with hastily pulled-together hair, look at the scene in front of her, and make a comment about missing the fun.

And damn it, he’d laugh at the joke. Laugh and be relieved and grab her hand and entwine his fingers with hers. Because they’d both been spared the situation, spared being locked in the hospital for who knows how long, and were both able to stand and watch from the outside.

Because right now, the reality was different.

Kerry was in the hospital, and he didn’t know anything.

\---

The door to the room slammed open and someone stifled a yell. The face that looked in was a young, fresh-faced, panicked hospital worker – no hospital uniform but instead another, a cafeteria worker. As his wide eyes scanned the room Kerry glanced behind him to check the empty hallway beyond, and someone beckoned him in.

He scurried into the room, knee falling to the floor before he was fully in. The door swung shut, slamming louder than intended. Someone whispered out a curse and Kerry edged up to glance out of the window. She stayed there for a good thirty seconds, but nothing changed.

“Clear,” she whispered to everyone, and saw the relief in the air. She slipped back down to the floor and gave out a smile to the others in the room. One returned it, and everyone began to relax.

\---

“Oh! Doctor Ramsay, I didn’t expect to see you.”

Ethan turned around, seeing Sienna Trinh looking at him, wide-eyed in surprise. She was wearing a short jacket, dark blue v-necked shirt, and loose capris, looking hardly out of place amongst all the other people watching the situation.

“Doctor Trinh. How are you?”

“I…uh, I should be asking _you_ that.” She stepped closer and peered towards the cordon. “Kerry left early this morning, and no one’s been able to get a hold of her since. I was hoping…”

“I’ve not seen her.” Ethan stood up straight, clasping his hands behind his back. He let out a breath and looked back at Trinh. “Knowing her, she tried to get here early. Research before work. And whatever is going on in _there_ , she walked straight into it.”

Sienna moved a half-step closer to Ethan and furrowed her brows. “You don’t-“

“Do you?”

Sienna pulled the end of her sleeve over her fingers, worrying it and running the fabric through her other hand. She let her arms fall to her sides and started to watch the hospital entrance, mirroring Ethan’s positioning.

\---

Another door slammed, another wave of people jumping from fright. Kerry glanced through the window once more, this one followed by a mouthed curse. She slid down the door, hand covering her mouth, shaking her head when someone looked over.

She desperately wanted to look through the window again, identify where he was going. There was no sign of a gun, and it wasn’t sure if he was potential attacker or victim. He looked normal, average, someone who could be anyone.

Something slammed against the door and Kerry stifled a yelp. She slammed her hands down onto the floor, feet stretched in front of her. The door jolted again, bouncing Kerry forwards. Everyone else shifted back away from the door, eyes glued up in fear of what might be happening.

“Get out! I know someone’s in there – _get out!_ ”

Kerry clasped her hands to her mouth and squeezed her eyes closed. She let out a low, slow breath and stood up, back to the door. As soon as her shoulders passed the bottom of the window the door flew open and someone grabbed her arm, dragging her back.

“Everyone out, now!”

Kerry was able to glance at the gunman; he was pointing the gun with a shaky hand, turning from one person to the next in the span of a few seconds. Sweat poured down his temple and he swallowed very audibly.

“Anyone else? Anyone else?” he said as the last person walked out of the room. Yanking Kerry with him, he stuck the gun in first, his head second. He stepped back, pulling Kerry with him once more, and raised then gun when someone tried to approach him.

“Get back! Get back or--” he paused, swallowing again. He didn’t seem all that focused on what was in front of him, distracted by something. He shook his head and walked up to another of the evacuated people, gun down by his side.

“How do I get out of here?”

The other person half held their hands up, glancing around nervously. He took a half step back, trying to see if someone would relieve him. Instead the gunman turned back to Kerry, forcing his way into her personal space.

“How the _hell_ do I get out of here?”

Kerry stood calm. “Back through the ER.”

The gunman pointed the barrel at Kerry. “Don’t joke around. _How do I get out?_ ”

“Back through the ER.”

He stepped even closer, sweat threatening to drip into Kerry’s clothing. He raised the gun back up again, and in the blink of an eye Kerry was stumbling back, blood in her mouth, pain on her forehead.

“Hey!”

She didn’t see who jumped, just that someone did, and two people fell to the ground. Another one joined in the fray, grabbing a flailing hand and pressing it down to the floor. The gun skittered away and a fourth person kicked it further away, and then everyone was in motion.

Most jumped on the gunman, holding him down and stopping any further movement. Two ran to Kerry’s side, one pressing a hand against her forehead while the other tried to talk to her. After a moment Kerry began to catch up, began to understand what they were saying. She pressed her own hand to her forehead and her fingers came back damp, sticky, bloody.

The gunman slammed into the wall face-first and someone patted him down, shaking his head when he found nothing.

“Well, what do we do?”


	2. Part Two

“Sir, please stay back. This is an active scene.”

“I know, that’s why I’m _asking you_ what’s going on.”

The officer shook his head and turned back to one of his colleagues. She gave him a shrug and he turned back.

“Everything we know is being given to the press. If you need an update you can check the news.”

“That’s bull.” Ethan didn’t say but he had been checking the news frantically, to the point where _Trinh_ had told him off. In as much as talking very meekly and alluding to the fact rather than outwardly saying it. He hadn’t read anything that he didn’t already know by just standing outside the building and walking the length of the perimeter and eavesdropping on conversations.

“I’m sorry, sir. That’s all I can tell you.”

Ethan sighed and folded his arms. The officer raised an eyebrow before sighing himself and shaking his head.

“Look. As long as you stay behind the perimeter, you can stay. No further.”

Ethan dropped his arms and gave a sharp, singular nod at the officer. The officer returned the gesture and walked away, his walkie-talkie crackling into life; he took the message, eyes darting back to the building for a brief moment before focusing back on the middle distance.

“What’s that?” Ethan said, looking at the same area of the building. He saw nothing, but…

“Nothing to worry about, sir. We have the situation under control.”

\---

The large double doors burst open and at least three SWAT officers poured in, weapons pointing at every direction of the room. They took in the sight – a good number of hospital employees, maybe a few visitors, and in the centre of the room one person being held by three others.

One of the SWAT officers moved to the far end of the room, peering through the glass window into the hallway there. “Clear,” he reported, and the other officers lowered their guns.

“What happened here?” the lead officer asked, and Danny almost sprang up to report. He glossed over the initial hideout in the supply room, starting the majority of the story when Kerry had been pulled out.

When Danny pointed out Kerry, the officer looked over at her. Kerry had at the very least received a headache from the pistol whip and had been urged into a chair for some semblance of rest. Seeing that, and the blood that had not quite been wiped off her forehead, the officer turned back to Danny.

After a few moments they ordered everyone except the gunman out of the room, in the hallway back towards the ER. They had a safe area set up – a place where they could go, be assessed, and figure out where to go from there.

“You okay?” Danny said, turning up at Kerry’s elbow. He stood by as she got up, careful to let her be independent but still available in case of a situation.

“I’m fine,” Kerry said, following the crowd out.

\---

Finally, finally, _finally_ the police were letting people out. Ethan had seen them take away a couple of people, likely including the perpetrator, and bundle others into waiting ambulances for care at other nearby hospitals. Kerry hadn't been one of them, and the knot in Ethan's stomach grew tighter each minute.

Was she too badly injured to be moved? Was she trapped somewhere and they couldn't get her out? Was she - oh God - was she a fatality?

He hadn't heard anything about someone _dying_ from his eavesdropping, but it was all possible that they didn't comment in case the gathered crowds panicked. They hadn't made any comments of the number of injured and walking wounded either, but-

"Kerry!"

At Sienna's shout, Ethan snapped his head around to the front entrance. Sure enough Kerry was there, looking a bit battered but walking on her own feet, a police officer by her side.

Ethan was dashing towards her before he could realise he was moving, swerving around an officer who vaguely tried to stop his advances.

"We'll be closing the hosp-"

Kerry let out a shocked breath as Ethan wrapped his arms around her, one hand tangling in her blond hair, the other resting at the small of her back, his face buried in her neck. The moment carried them a half-turn, Ethan now facing the officer.

"Kerry. _Kerry_. Oh, God, are you okay? What happened in there? Are you injured?" His voice was low and muffled, more to express his relief than expecting answers.

"I'm sorry, Mister...?" the officer said, her large brown eyes looking him up and down scornfully.

"Doctor Ramsey. I work here."

Ethan disentangled himself from Kerry, but still kept a secure arm around her waist. She was downcast, eyes unfocused, and an injury on her forehead already tended to with butterfly stitches.

"You appear to know Doctor Hawethorne rather well. I was just asking if there was someone she could call to accompany her home."

Ethan looked back, seeing Sienna at the police cordon, then back to Kerry. "I'll get her home."

The officer gave a faint smile, before handing over Kerry's backpack. Ethan slung it over his shoulder, moving his other arm to Kerry's shoulders and guided her outside the cordon.

"Kerry!"

Sienna crushed Kerry in a hug, catching Ethan's arm. He carefully extracted himself, looking around at the assorted crowds. A couple of news crews were trying to get interviews from the walking wounded, but all brushed past. One seemed to catch Ethan looking at him, but Ethan smoothly turned back to Kerry and Sienna.

"It's all fine. A few injured, no one got killed. They're closing down all non-essential departments and advising people go to other hospitals."

"And recommend you get home," Ethan said, trying to adopt a professional stance. "You said you weren't working today, Trinh?"

"No." Sienna pulled the cuff of her sweater over her hand. "I got the message on my pager. I'm only here..."

_Because of Kerry. For Kerry._

Ethan was ready to kick himself. Acting like an unprofessional fool over the situation; of _course_ Kerry would head back with Trinh, relax with her roommates-

"Doctor Ramsey already volunteered," Kerry said, a light blush dusting her cheeks. She turned to him, a smile that didn't reach her eyes. "Unless you have urgent medical business to attend?"

_Don't give me a way out. Be direct._

"Oh." Sienna glanced between them. "Well, Kerry, shall we head home?"

Ethan sighed and took two steps away, back in the direction of the hospital when a hand wrapped around his. He glanced back to see Kerry, guilt in her eyes, and Sienna back where he'd left them.

"Tell everyone I'm fine, and I'll see them tomorrow."

Sienna grinned and made a gesture that seemed almost like a hastily-aborted thumbs up. Ethan just shook his head as he and Kerry walked around to the far side of the hospital.

When he needed to let go of Kerry's hand in order to request a taxi, his own hand felt exceedingly cold, losing her warmth. As soon as the taxi was on its way - surge pricing be damned - he reclaimed her hand in his, twisting his fingers around hers and entwining them together.

"Some things are worth the risk, then," Kerry said, a hint of a smile on her face. She nodded over to a camera crew who had their sights firmly focused on them, and Ethan cursed under his breath.

"Tomorrow. I'll figure that out tomorrow." Ethan left the rest of his thoughts unsaid, though to Kerry they were likely decently obvious, especially when Ethan refused to let her hand go for even a moment before the taxi arrived. Even when it did, it was only for the length of time it took Ethan to open the door, let Kerry slide in, get in himself, and retake her hand.

Ethan gave the taxi driver directions to his apartment and the river began to head off, only shaking his head at the scene around the hospital for the briefest of seconds.

Dozens of thoughts were running through Ethan's mind, though he didn't want to risk voicing any of them before he and Kerry were alone. They ran the full spectrum of emotion from near-anger at Kerry for potentially putting herself in a situation where she got injured ( _what do you think I'd do without you?_ ) to the downright ridiculous or absurd ( _if the only way I can ensure you'll be safe is to be with you forever, then that's what will happen_ ).

Kerry herself was distant, staring out of the window at nothing in particular. After a couple of minutes she did let herself slowly relax and shuffled over to rest her head on Ethan's shoulder as best she could, and closed her eyes.

Ethan clenched his free hand into a fist. _Damn it, Rookie. What the_ hell _were you thinking today? You've been letting yourself get worked to the bone already, and now this?_ He mused if he could talk Naveen into giving her a few days off work - under the pretense of stress and recovering from the incident, but...

Hel, no. Naveen would see right through him, even if it _was_ out of genuine concern. He'd all but give a satisfied smile and tell Ethan to be happy if word of Ethan and Kerry's involvement reached him, which was not professional behaviour.

Before Ethan could mull on that point, the taxi pulled up outside Ethan's apartment. He nudged Kerry, who had started to doze off, and she stretched and blinked her eye a couple of times. Ethan paid the taxi driver with a swipe of his card, got out and moved around to the other side to hold open Kerry's door for her. She gave him a look that was half amusement and half gratitude before accompanying him into the building.

Ethan's apartment was almost, but not quite, penthouse level. It was still reasonably high up, enough so that the elevator ride up began to set Ethan on edge. He'd fought down the urge to grab Kerry's hand again - if he did, he wouldn't have stopped at just hand-holding. Instead he slid his hand into his pants pockets, ordering his thoughts and doing his best to look calm and act neutral.

That dam broke as soon as he stepped into the apartment behind Kerry, and she turned around to him.

" _Kerry._ "

One hand was on her hip, the other around her shoulders, chin nestled atop her shoulder, and all the stress and anxiety threatening to burst out.

One wrenched sob was followed by another, and soon a third. Hot tears dripped onto Ethan's chin and he pulled back, gently resting a hand on each side of Kerry's face.

"I...I..." Kerry could barely get a syllable out in between sobs, and Ethan pulled her close. Tears rained down on his shirt and he let her cry out all the emotion she had been feeling that day.

Ethan managed to maneuver the two of them to the sofa, and he half lifted Kerry onto his lap, one leg across his, the other hanging loose and not quite touching the floor. He brushed a few strands of loose hair from her face, her delicate hairstyle having come loose a long time prior.

Before too long Kerry's sobs subsided and she raised a hand to clumsily flick away her tears. "Ethan, I-"

"Don't say you're sorry," Ethan said, squeezing her close. "Don't _ever_ say you're sorry in a situation like this. It's not your fault."

Kerry let out a few more sniffles before she seemed to return to normal. She didn't make a move to get away from Ethan, and he would fight his way through hell before he let go of her so soon. Instead he moved a hand to gently rub up and down her back, while the other one cupped her chin.

"If you want to talk about what happened..."

Kerry shook her head. "Not now. Not this moment. I just want to push it all out of my mind."

Ethan nodded. He glanced over at the clock and made a quick calculation. "When was the last time you ate?"

The fact that Kerry had to pause was enough to tell him everything he knew. He grabbed his phone out of his pocket and tried, one-handed, to unlock his phone and navigate through it.

"Need some help?" Kerry said, unwrapping a hand from the back of Ethan's neck. He gave her look before relenting, and handed her the phone before returning his hand to her cheek.

"What am I looking for?"

"Guru Delights, under saved contacts."

Ethan watched as her slim fingers danced over the screen, memories of her tapping away at a laptop or skimming through a book with the same graceful motions coming to mind.

Kerry evidently found the number as she hit one section deftly, then raised the phone to her ear. A few seconds later she handed the phone over to Ethan, and barely one full ring later someone picked up on the other end.

"This is an unusual time to be calling, Ethan," the woman on the other end said, voice heavy with laughter. "Your usual order?"

"Please, Manjula," Ethan said, then flicked his eyes up to look at Kerry. He faltered; he ordered the exact same thing from the restaurant every time that he didn't even know what other options might be there. "Uh, and I don't know what you want, Kerry-"

The gleeful laugh from Manjula was loud enough that Kerry could hear it as clearly as if the woman was standing next to her, and Kerry let out a grin.

"My word, Ethan. I don't think I've ever heard you talking to someone else there. I didn't even think you had a social life!"

"Thank you, Manjula. Uh, chef's recommendation for Kerry." Ethan looked up at Kerry, brows knotted together and a very clear 'help me' expression on his face. Kerry let out a low laugh, one that turned into slightly more full-on amusement after Ethan gave his payment details and ended the call.

"Manjula is the grandmother of anyone who visits that restaurant. She'll be asking after you the next time she sees me."

"Maybe you'll have to introduce us then," Kerry said, grabbing Ethan's hand and running her fingers over his palm. Ethan just looked at her before pulling her fully onto his lap.

\---

Twenty-five minutes later the food had arrived; Manjula's nephew Ajith tried to bend hi hed around the doorway, trying to see who Ethan's mystery guest was. Whether that was because his aunt had asked him or he was genuinely curious himself was a debate, but not one that Ethan was willing to entertain. He tipped Ajith, unpacked most of the food, and split all the containers between himself and Kerry.

They ate together on the sofa, plates balanced on bended knees and background entertainment provided by a soothing nature documentary narrated by a soft-spoken man. Ethan noticed Kerry's attention grabbed when mention of the Amazon was made, but she herself didn't raise the subject - much as Ethan didn't want to discuss it he knew they would have to do so at some point.

He should have known that nothing would have changed. The moment he came back to Edenbrook, he'd see Kerry again, and everything he'd tried to push down and forget for those two months would come rushing back to the surface.

He was a fool then, and an even bigger fool now.

As if to cement that point, Ethan's phone began to buzz on the table. Kerry reached over for it and glanced at the screen, holding it out to Ethan.

"It's Naveen."

Ethan closed his eyes and let out a sigh, mentally cursing before he took the phone from Kerry. Naveen had seen way too much of the intimacy between Ethan and Kerry while he was being treated, and rather than even think of reprimanding them he had almost given them his blessing. Still, he thought he was a dying man at that point, so there was the possibility that he was letting himself hope that Ethan would have some semblance of joy in his life outside of the hospital and the diagnostics team.

"Ethan. Hope you're well. I was expecting that you would be in the hospital today, even after the incident."

Ethan ran a hand through his hair and stood up, Kerry shifting out of the way. "Doctor Banerji. I was-"

"Acting on other priorities? I've seen the local news; you made quite a scene in front of a few people."

Ethan bit his tongue and cast a look over at Kerry. She was looking back at him from the sofa, a puzzled look on her face. Ethan ignored her and walked over to the kitchen island. He hoped that he was out of earshot previously, but he didn't want the chance Kerry could overhear what might be the end of her time at Edenbrook.

"Naveen, I'm-"

"Don't apologise. This complicates things for the hospital, but I'm anticipating that won't be for a few days."

Ethan tugged at his collar and leaned against the island. "Kerry needs the time off. She hasn't said much of what happened and I don't want to press her." Ethan glanced up, seeing that Kerry had gone back to watching the TV; hopefully Ethan was speaking softly enough that she didn't notice.

"As I'd expect. We're working on essential staff only here, and as much as I disagree, the diagnostics staff isn't essential."

"Are you saying-"

"Take the time off, Ethan. At least a couple of days. Same to Kerry, on the condition that she talks to one of our therapists when she gets back. We had someone talk to her before she left, but -”

“I understand,” Ethan said. He glanced out of the window in the vague direction of the hospital, though there was no chance he could see the building from his point.

“Get some rest, Ethan. I’ll see you in a few days.”

Ethan ended the call and veered back towards the bag of food. He’d recognised the imarti – fried dough doused in sugar syrup – and had shaken his head at the thought. He’d certainly get an earful from Manjula the next time he visited the restaurant.

Nevertheless, he took the sweets from the bag and walked back to the sofa, offering Kerry them as he sat down. She took one and began to eat in silence, both lost in their own thoughts.

“Naveen says you have the next few days off. So do I. I don’t-“ Ethan cut himself off, trying to think. “If you want to go back to your apartment.”

Kerry grabbed his hand. “I want to stay here. At least for tonight.”

Ethan smiled and turned his hand around, entwining his fingers around Kerry’s. She shuffled over and leaned her head on his shoulder, eyes fluttering close.

_Tomorrow. We’ll figure this out tomorrow. Tonight is just us._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took more time than I expected, and ended up being far longer than expected. There is still another part to this, but it is to be posted as a separate story for those of you that don't want to necessarily read the more intimate end of this. Nevertheless, I hope you enjoyed it :)


End file.
